Remember the other day, when I thought I had discovered THE mayhem? I was wrong, that was nothin’!! Recently Subway started running an ad campaign for a super-stuffed sandwich. And the few Subway restaurants around my home hung signs in their windows with pictures of the monster. It’s shown on a twisted bread, which looks similar to their party sub bread. I believe they say in the commercial it has triple the meat of a normal Subway sandwich.

I have to assume that Subway launched this product, even though it absolutely goes against their years of advertising and branding as a healthier alternative, because of Quizno’s recent “WrongWay” campaign that talks about how little meat there is in a Subway sandwich. It seems there are many people who hate the campaign, and I’m not surprised, it was created by a tiny ad firm and is basically the $80 million dollar equivalent of five year old’s name calling. And who is Quizno’s to name call anyway, Subway could just as easily call them “Ratty’s“.

Anyway, on to the point. Today, I wanted to try that great big Super Stuffed Subway Sandwich. I headed to a nearby Subway at Park & 30th Subway. Before walking in I noticed they didn’t have the sandwich image in the window, and after asking the clerk, they weren’t carrying the sandwich yet. He pointed us to the Subway at Madison and 33rd Subway. Sal and I walked over to the second subway, which had the picture in the window, and after walking in, noticed they had signs all over the store and the menu board for the super stuffed.

And so began the Abbott and Costello routine… I asked Clerk #1 if the super stuffed comes in 6″ and 12″ and how much it costs (and I pointed to the sign). He asks Clerk #2, and then says “$9” (note the lack of answer about sizes). I ignored the extreme price, because I’m doing this for you, the readers! Then I pointed at the picture that had two versions: “Meat & Cheese” and “The Feast,” and said “Ok, I’ll take ‘The Feast'”. Clerk #1 replies “Which sandwich?” I repeat myself, “The Feast” (pointing slightly more vigorously). He looked confused. I looked at Sal, who offered no help. I tried explaining to Clerk #1 that “The Feast” is, in fact, the sandwich and that it is listed on the board. He brings in Clerk #2. I managed to snap a picture of the two guys, shown below, to the right.

Before continuing, I should note that all of this took place with a crazed, Russian accent (well at least on their side of the counter). After another quick round of the “What sandwich?” game with Clerk #2, Clerk #2 asks, “Which bread do you want it on?” I am now confused. The marketing campaign clearly touts their new, twisted, huge bread. Nevertheless, I ask “What are my options?” He points to the normal bread options and says “Any of these.” Confused, I ask “The twisted bread comes in these flavors?” Clerk #2 says “No, these are the only kinds we have.” I say “The Super Stuffed is supposed to come on twisted bread,” and again, I point vigorously at the huge picture one foot behind him, which apparently he’s never looked at.

After a few more mind games with crazy clerks at Subway, I walked out, sandwichless, dazed and confused. Had Sal not been there, I would’ve assumed I dreamt/nightmared the insane volley of wits with the Subway clerks. Particularly, because I searched for the “Super Stuffed Subway Sandwich” online and the search engines have got no response. Did I dream all this marketing?

Anyway, I will continue my hunt another day for the sandwich. Today, I substituted for a Stuffed Slice of pepperoni and sausage from Bella Napoli Bella Napoli, a fantastic pizza joint. If you go, try their mozzarella en carrozza, it’s amazing.

posted by Lon at 12:50 PM Filed under Restaurants, Take-out/Delivery. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.